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The 4C’s for Dating Women That Lead to a Healthy Partnership

Love is a basic human need. But unlike quality food and potable water, it’s not something you can just go to your nearest supermarket and pick off the shelf. It’s something that has to happen or be worked for.

Sometimes we just meet someone along the way, perhaps at work, school, party, or gym. A spark happens and the love story unfurls when you start dating women.

Not everyone is that lucky. Some people need to go out and make love happen. This is the concept of dating. And not everyone gets that right either.

women with arms stretched

We all start out trying to be the hottest possible version of ourselves. That might work for a few years, depending on how physically gifted you are. But as we age, we realize one thing: if we want to have a lasting relationship, we need to practice the fundamentals.

The fundamentals of anything are usually the most boring and tedious elements. But they are the driving force for success at the thing you want to do.

In dating, there are fundamentals as well. And if you want to become good at dating, those are what you should focus on more than anything. To make things simple, let’s narrow them down to the four C’s of dating.

Communication

Having good communication skills is a requirement before you start dating. In relationships, you need to explain to your partner what you are experiencing and what your needs are.

The act of communicating not only helps to meet your personal needs, but it also helps you to be connected. Talk to each other. No matter how well you know and love each other, you cannot read your partner’s mind. We need to communicate clearly to avoid misunderstandings that may cause hurt, anger, resentment, or confusion.

Consent

Before the start of any relationship, you must practice asking for consent. It’s the art of respecting boundaries — both personal and emotional. It doesn’t just apply to sex but also to everything that involves her.

When you’re being intimate, you need to communicate. And it should happen every time for every type of activity. Consenting to one activity, at one time, does not mean someone gives consent for other activities or the same activity on other occasions.

For example, agreeing to kiss someone doesn’t permit that person to remove your clothes. Having sex with someone in the past doesn’t give that person permission to have sex with you again in the future. It’s important to discuss boundaries and expectations with your partner before engaging in any sexual behavior.

Commitment

Commitment is synonymous with long-term. Your bond extends beyond just having fun – your commitment to each other shows that you both will be together through the good times and the bad. It is this intention to commit that prolongs your relationship, allowing it to continue.

There are no specific rules for commitment – you both are the ones who decide what you will be committing to. Every relationship is unique, and so are your decisions and choices. Your promises can be about anything – trust, faithfulness, openness, or monogamy – in your relationship. Of course, your promises should also cover money issues, household responsibilities, childcare, etc.

Compromise

Good compromises help you and your partner grow together as a team. They foster trust, accountability, consistency, and security in your relationship. A compromise shows that you have a common goal: a healthy partnership, rather than your singular happiness at heart.

Compromises aren’t selfish, whereas someone who expects you to make sacrifices probably is.

You can expect to compromise some things in a relationship. That’s what happens when your life stops being all about you. But if you feel like you are giving more than you are receiving, or if your compromises start to feel more like sacrifices, then it might be time to reevaluate the standards and boundaries that exist between you and your partner, or else you’ll be falling into the dangerous people-pleasing territory.

Consistency

Consistent behavior is a key component of every successful long-term relationship. A consistent partner is someone who is reliable. Learn more about the importance of consistency in romantic relationships.

Consistency means maintaining a regular pattern of behavior. A consistent partner exhibits qualities such as dependability and predictability. These qualities are what can carry a relationship beyond the honeymoon phase and lead to long-term secure partnerships.

This story was originally published on Medium: The 4C’s of Dating Women


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